Paua Series: "Intrigue Me."
For some reason, it has been difficult for me to write this. Maybe it is because I don’t think that I could write it as beautiful as the whole relationship was. If people were to know or read about it, they would say that our relationship was like a movie or a romance novel. To be honest, it felt like it was. I never knew that something so good would ever happen to me. I was in love before but never truly in love. And there is no denying that this relationship was true love. We had so many amazing, beautiful and romantic memories together and for that I am so grateful to have experienced something so magical with someone who treated me so amazing and beautiful as well. These memories included each other’s school balls, Midnight in Paris and Winter wonderland where we fell in love while dancing to ‘Thinking out loud’, there were also Casabella lane, the zoo, park benches, art galleries, museums, car rides, sunsets, gardens, romantic walks, picnics, cafes, libraries and reading poetry. I knew that he did not like poetry but he knew my passion for it and love for Rumi so he would always recite me poems.
He was selfless towards me and would have done anything within his means to help me and make me happy. He took good care for me and never failed to make me laugh or smile. He is the best person to talk to and we always had the best conversations where it was always interesting, or had some meaning in which we felt strong about. Ultimately, his intelligence, stories and wittiness intrigued me. He used to always say that we were on the same wavelength. And I believe that it’s true. I guess both of us were also opinionated in our own ways but we listened, understood and respected each other’s thoughts and values.
In psychology, they say that a major part of attraction is similarity. However, I could honestly say that we did not have much in common. But somehow we complemented each other and we made each other better versions of ourselves. We also learnt so many things and each of us tried to participate in the hobbies that the other like. Another reason why similarity is so important is because there would be less arguments. And still I cannot remember a time when we did argue or fought and if we did, we were mature and loved each other enough to overcome it. Overall, all I could remember was how happy we were together and so the relationship was a positive connection for both of us.
I must admit that we were young. Eighteen and in our last year of high school. Maybe one or two people thought that we we’re naïve and what we were going through was just a hormonal phase. But to my defence, the feelings were just too strong and sincere for it to be anything else other than true love. And so, we learnt to not care of what other people thought of us. Together we were a team and we tried our best in our relationship. But I also guess that we as humans have our own limits.
It is sad to say that no matter how hard you try and no matter how much you cry and pray for something to happen or last, sometimes things are out of your own control. Sometimes life is not fair. But that’s life and not everything can go the way you want them to. Sometimes you are meant to have only stayed with the person for the time that you are supposed to. And maybe it’s a good thing. Maybe you meet someone for a reason. Maybe we were and still are on the same wavelength. Maybe people come and go. Maybe a part of loving someone is letting go. Maybe a part of me will always love him. Maybe all good things do come to an end. Or maybe it was just too good to be true to begin with.
I think that my love towards him was so deep that the oceans would have been jealous. I truly believe that what I had with him was something very special and that we shared a unique connection. A rare connection which I know some people search for their whole lives. However, we had immovable barriers that kept us apart and I don’t think that either of us could overcome them. And although at the time we both wished that we could be together for a thousand years, right now, for me, to have had him in my life- even if it was only for a short while, he felt like a gift that I will forever cherish and be grateful for. There is no doubt that he is truly special to me and is someone I will always deeply care for.
When reflecting on this relationship, I have learnt a lot of things. You should always give someone a chance; you never know because they might turn out to be the best thing that you ever had. Another thing is to always make the effort to learn about each other’s values and traditions, especially if you both come from a different background. A third thing I’ve learnt was that to also make the relationship work, you must give the other person the chance and time to learn and do whatever it takes to make the relationship work. Lastly, I learnt to be patient and accept that even though it hurts (and it hurt so much), if you truly love someone, sometimes letting them go might be the best thing that you could do for them to let them continue and live their life.
…And yes, he was the one who gave me the Paua shell. He gave it the first time he said the three words to me as a token for his love. The story behind the Paua shell was that he waited eight years to give it to somebody who was special to him and so, I am very honoured and grateful for his sincerity and love that he had for me.