Sixteen.

Screen Shot 2018-04-13 at 11.48.16 PM.png

At the start of this year, I talked about finding the old me again. Well, in all honesty, it has been four months and I have been stuck until recently (as in the last couple of days). Tonight I decided to take a trip down memory lane and it was interesting to see the things that I had treasured. I literally have three memory boxes filled with photographs, diaries, letters, achievements and even receipts.

There were so many things that made me smile, that made me cringe and even made my heart beat faster. Nonetheless, they made me grateful for the life that I have had so far. And they made me realise that life is so precious.

Unfortunately, it seems that life is going so fast and I couldn't believe that I was looking at pictures from two years ago because it felt like they were just taken yesterday.

Nonetheless, out of all of my years, sixteen was the year. It was just a year where a lot of good things had happened which I am so grateful for.

While going through my memory boxes, there is one diary that stood out the most, mainly because it is bright pink and it is the only diary I have ever managed to finish writing in. And as you might have guessed it, the diary holds everything and anything that had happened when I was sixteen.

I was surprised to read that amongst all the cringeworthy entries, there were a couple that was actually kinda wise. When I was reading them, it was like the sixteen-year-old Yantie was talking to me.

On the very first page of the diary, the sixteen-year-old Yantie wrote: "Some things are meant to be forgotten and some things are meant to be cherished. This diary holds many memories that will be remembered. When I reflect on this, everything seems to be determined by Qadar- Allah's will and with that, I embrace my fate. Now I am more grateful for the good things that have happened and patient for the bad. I have grown to put all of my trust in Allah because He is the best of planners and He has planned what is best for me."

Even then I knew that everything will be okay because God loves me. And that humbles me.

InsyaAllah, with the guidance of God, I will try to be the best version of Yantie. It may not happen tomorrow or next week but it will happen and I trust that it will happen beautifully.